*WARNING* Post is extremely long but this is a story I must tell in detail. It’s a personal account that brought me to the realization that this commandment is very much needed.
This will probably be my most personal blog up to date, but it surely won’t be my last. I learned many things while in college but it mostly consisted of things that could not be taught in any classroom . I’ve come across many different people from all walks of life as expected, but nothing came close to what I encountered the summer of my sophomore year. This was the first summer while I was in school that I opted not to go home to new jersey to visit the family & get the quite essential summer job. Instead I landed a sweet ass job at a nearby casino and stayed to take some summer courses. Needless to say the summer turned out to be more play and no work. Although it was the summer & I expected the campus to be absolutely dry we always found some way to party & stay high. Yes high as in lifted, faded, cooked, and stoned. If you judged this book by its cover, I don’t seem like the wild & experimental type, I’m more so quite & reserved. Honestly, I never really explored the art of smoke and marijuana to the extent that I did this summer. I mean, I was never really into that kind of stuff…not in the slightest bit. The classes were like 3 hrs long, 4 days a week, and while in the classroom I was in a complete daze pretty much looking for my next spliff. The Kush tended to cloud up my mind and the Mary Jane lingered and marinated all in my head suppressing my intellect. It was during this time I allowed the devil to fully enter my life. I took a trip to a place I’ve never gone and canoodled wit a shoota like my name was robin thick.
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It was I believe April something in the year of 2007 & the campus usually hosted the yearly block parties. Everyone would gather around the freshman dormitories and Greek plots to show off once the weather got hot. I was there with my fave two girls at the time who were more spontaneous than I, but we all complimented each other one way or another. One was a “Dj” and was using this gathering as a platform for networking. We partied & bull shitted talking to people who we could honestly give two shits about, when we were saved by the grace of a beastly figure. The dude was by no means easy on the eyes and was kind of a goof to me & I’d never seen him before. My friend the “DJ” who we will affectionately refer to as LL for the stories purpose, clearly knew him well. The Two of them chatted it up for a while, as My friend D and I discreetly clowned the dudes appearance (he was a mess). After the convo was completed LL came to us & told us that the dude wanted her to DJ his party. Clearly we were hype/excited because, lets face it, there wasn’t much else to do and we were pretty interested in seeing LL’s skills. So, when she asked us to accompany her, the response was quite clear…”hell yea”. We left the Plot area to get the equipment ready for showcase and headed to the spot. Soon as we stepped foot in the house it was liquor galore and Me and D pretty much had a good idea of where we would be posted most of the night (face down in a toilet cause we were getting shit faced trashed). As LL spinned and the house began to fill up, we con’d dudes into bringing loads of liquor into the DJ area. They had set LL’s equipment up in a nice little back room and it actually served the same purpose of an authentic Dj booth. Drinking & tip drillin (serious ass shaking) was pretty much what we did back there. Loads of dudes pilled in to joke & at times watch us act a fool, but who cared it was all in drunken fun and we pretty much PRAYED we wouldn’t remember much in the morning. 30 mins into LL’s set, a dude walked in that I’d never seen before that night resembling exactly my craze at the time…tall, brown-skinned poppin like, dreads, and a heavy swaggastem (probably most important ingredient of it all).We’ll just call him Sniper, because he shot me down with his swagger and the name will also become more suiting as the tale continues. The second I saw him I told LL in my drunken demeanor “I want him” I probably reiterated that fact about 100 times, you know how when people get drunk, they tend to repeat the same shit over & over again a million different ways. Dudes came & went in between the Dj area & main room as me and D sat in a drunken daze, occasionally getting up & shaking it to the beat. I have to admit, I’d never approached a guy before that evening, they all seemed to come to me, but there was something about that liquor courage that night, that made me go after what I fiend. I lured D out of the DJ room under false pretences, I told her I wanted to go to the smoking room, which was located conveniently on the other end of the party, to play puff puff pass. As I sifted through the crowd I spotted Sniper surprisingly free of any chicks vibing on his meat. I have no clue where this courage came from like I said before, or well maybe I do, but as I walked by I slightly tugged on his belt buckle, slid my hand over the peen imprint in his jeans, and looked him straight in his eyes. Just as me and D got to the smoking room and were about to crack up at the fuckary I’d just display , sniper walked in right behind us. We exchanged numbers and long story short after the party ended, his aim was to Smack it up & bathe all in it and the mutual attraction bloomed into the summer.
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We texted all the time, spoke on the phone often which was so out of my character, I usually don’t talk to dudes on the phone I’m the SEXTING type. He came over once to overcome and conquer, as do most dudes, but the sexual attraction just wasn’t there anymore. I guess the alcohol made him look way better that night than he actually did. He still had killa swag though so that managed to keep me intrigued, but my legs on the other hand were not under any circumstances planning to part ways for the man. He’d come by my place often which had me thinking “how does he even get on this campus? I thought we had security“. Nigga was on the campus faithfully like he was enrolled, but eh? I just waved it off. He would come through with his cousins, “brother”, and whoever else was apart of his entourage for the night like my apt was his retreat. I’d often invite two girls from downstairs to come up (they will become more relevant as the post continues) who were once upon a time considered friends or more so frienimies. I use to call them up to chill because they were expedient and I didn’t like being around all those dudes by myself. Although I knew they would never do anything to me, I just didn’t want to be that token “only” female. We would chill and joke around the whole night, and sniper even got me to sip and get hip to that syrup aka that liquid lean. The next night he text me to make it clear that he was stopping by & would be there in less than 5 mins, as he did frequently. I never knew where he was coming from or cared too much to ask I mean he wasn’t my man & I wasn’t his girl. At this time, I was allowing one of my other friends who we will call Gi to stay with me who basically worked 24/7 so really only used my crib to sleep. So when he walked in we were laying in the bed together, lol, not on any homo tip just as friends.. Gi was very boisterous and bold so she flirted with him for a bit, we talked about bull shit & before I knew it this dude was flashing his 9 as in millimeter and placed it firmly on my night table. I messed with, what I considered, a few thugs in my past but none ever flashed their glock around without a care in the world. He proceeded to go on about how he shot at some dudes on campus Which on one occasion I remembered vividly b/c I too was one of the people running to flee the scene. He then went on to talk about the beef he had with a specific crew that just blew my mind, b/c I actually knew the group and remember them telling me their turn of events. It was crazy to be finally able to put a face to the man who I heard so much about and here I am “sleeping” with the enemy. Gi was all into his thug life style, she was playing with the 9 and asking questions on how to shoot it and jokingly aiming it at my roomates room, while I on the other hand was taken back. Finally he hinted that Gi had over stayed her welcome, so she proceeded to assume her position on the living room couch. Once again he tried to kiss me, and do all that foreplay shit & although shit had gone further than before I was not about to let this shooting ass negro up inside…Access Denied. He left and threw a low blow at me asking “what’s yo problem? U act like u never had sex before?”, but it didn’t phase me, I just rolled over on him and proceeded to go to sleep. He left, and that was that. The following day I told LL the story about him pulling the gun out & she just laughed and said “Damn girl, I don’t how his girlfriend put up with that”. I’m like “girlfriend?” ::Wendy Surprise Face:::… LL continues “yes deez his girlfriend, bitch I told you he had one the first time you said you wanted him”. Alcohol is a hell of a substance because I honestly didn’t remember any of that. So ok, the dude has a girlfriend but why is he on this campus so often. Me and Gi set an investigation underway with LL on deck and honestly facebook will tell you everything a girl needs to know about a nigga. The dude was a serial whore, he was ejaculating in the brains of chicks all over my campus that has a population of only 3,000, he even had chicks vandalizing his car, sparring over him and a child in one state and another chick pregnant where my school was located, who worked at a store I visited frequently so I‘d spoken to his soon to be baby moms on many occasions. Damn, this niggas track record was a mile long. The sad thing is, after all that I knew, I STILL allowed this dude to continue to retreat to my room, in some sense i was addicted. 1 month later we got into a argument at 6 in the morning like the dude couldn’t sleep with this conflict on his mind. Apparently one of the girls I invited to come up to chill from downstairs one night sniper & his dudes were there, had been I guess, texting/sexting him for a min so basically we got into a argument over her knowing his where abouts one night b/c of me. But, The shadiest thing of it all is, I remember giving the chick his number b/c “allegedly” she was at a hotel party & he was the only person she knew, and she had left her purse & needed to get back into the room. I later on found out that 1 of our mutual associates was in reality the hostess of the event & we both had that persons number. So the frienemy of mines had basically shiest me out of giving her snipers number for her own personal records, I got… got. Anyway, me & sniper stopped talking for like 2 weeks which during that period some of his entourage thought it was acceptable to flee to my crib at their leisure whenever they wanted to, with or without him. I never liked the idea, but Gi would often open the door and let them in, so in light of the events we would sit there and crack jokes the whole time (nothing serious). I guess sniper was upset about that because when me and GI ran into him at a nearby gas station, in the mist of his own COUSIN trying to spit game to me, he affectionately PUNCHED the shit out of me. He claimed I was acting like a child by ignoring him and how he was sorry. He went on to profess that he didn't mean to get mad its just that even his own mother knows not to give out his location status..Blah..Blah..Blah. Now as if that wasn’t enough, he warmly ended this heart felt convo by begging to come to my room which I politely declined. After that altercation, eventhough I should have cut him off completely, the drama between us continued to escalate.
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His attitude turned from annoyed to pure anger/hate and his devilish ways became more apparent. He was the spawn of Satan who was hitting the bottom of every other pussy hole on my campus & even managed to insert me into one of his other lover’s quarrels. He would text me trying to stop by & once I’d decline curse me out , and attempt to shatter my morale by threatening me with a “alleged” sex tape that one of his friends had on me which I just knew couldn't be true. He would choke me up when I backed talk and although it would be all fun and games to him at times I was genuinely frightened. Everyday more females that he was breaking off would come to light other than the 10 I ALREADY knew about. Of course, he would deny them, which just made me even more infuriated, b/c 1. If he were fuckin all these chicks, why would he continue to lay up with me sporadically throughout the day? 2. How does he make time for all these chicks? 3. How often has he come up here from visiting that bitchass frienemy of mines from downstairs? When I would start calling him out on his bullshit and tell him to get out, he would turn into this completely different person. Lets face it, he was already a piece of shit, but he would firmly grab my arm, squeezing it as hard as he could and say the harshest thing that came to mind. As he yoked me up, he would shout out shit that often consisted of me being a whore because I did more dirt than he and would refer back to that mysterious sex tape. One day his cousins had stopped by claiming they needed a place to sleep b/c sniper and his other boy had a apartment full of chicks and they were just not feeling them. They stayed although I opposed, and signaled and attempted to press the campus alert button & slept on the floor as me and Gi slept in the bed as usual. The next day I was being called every word for whore when sniper saw me in public, clearly he thought something had gone down with his cousins or friend or was just plain ole jealous . This man was the devil & it sickens me that my judge of character missed this demon by a hell of a mark. I felt so much anger towards him for putting me through an emotional roller coaster. I feel like I was such a wholesome girl before college, piff and him. I use to be the one who would lie to my girlfriends about sexual encounters b/c I actually was too afraid to really engage in any and felt like socially I was behind. Moral of this story is, women do your RESEARCH. In college the majority of dudes are smashing & dashing probably the same chick you sit 3 seats down from in class. Giving a dude the title of boyfriend doesn’t change their ways, it only makes YOU feel more exclusive. Men are dogs and some will never out grow that, so make sure you know the person you are laying down with FULLY because with dudes there is no such thing as benefit of the doubt. Although, it isn’t b/c of sniper that I’m pretty much heartless, for I was given the name winter years ago in high school, he surely did contribute to my fuck every nigga mentality. There has been a ice box where my heart use to be for years, but sniper made me perfect the game of playing niggas first before they ever get the chance to do the same. I know I’ve hurt a lot of feelings by being this way and yea, missed out on some good dudes, but that bitch name GAME, I took from niggas years ago and they’ll never get her back. Perhaps I’m so bitter because I liked him deep down inside, he wasn’t that cute but something still kept me interested maybe it was the thug life appeal. I mean, we did use to talk and share things, and I just don’t know how to explain it but i think i got a little rush because i knew i was playing with danger. Maybe I enjoyed playing with fire, but ladies this thug loving is so overrated, 9/10 dudes like sniper will never change. I truly danced with the devil with him, this post is already too long so I can’t go into as much detail as I would like but he took me places I’ve never been, and even in the mist of puffing the magic dragon I was scorned by him.
Pa Yow 101- Thou shall not dance with the devil he's a LIE & a FRAUD. pow
